Conversation: Bastardizing Literary Figures

Webhead says:

Hi Jago it's Mary

Tea-tea Mong-Whore says:

Hi, Mary. It's jago.

Girly Girl says:

How you doin?

Tea-tea Mong-Whore says:

Tired

Girly Girl says:

Me too....zzzzzzz

Tea-tea Mong-Whore says:

Wake up!

Girly Girl says:

What? What? Where am I?

Tea-tea Mong-Whore says:

You're in Narnia.

Girly Girl says:

Aslan? is that y ou?

Tea-tea Mong-Whore says:

Yup. I'm Aslan, Lion king extraordinaire, and Godly allegory. Give me money!

Girly Girl says:

Didn't you die and come back to life?

Tea-tea Mong-Whore says:

Twice! Give me money!

Girly Girl says:

Why would a lion need money?

Tea-tea Mong-Whore says:

Ummm...

Tea-tea Mong-Whore says:

For beer, okay? Aslan needs beer.

Girly Girl says:

beer?

Girly Girl says:

Beer is bad

Girly Girl says:

for lions

Tea-tea Mong-Whore says:

You happy, girl? You happy that your king's an alcoholic?

Girly Girl says:

No

Tea-tea Mong-Whore says:

Well GOOD! Now get me beer money! And let's never speak of this again!

Girly Girl says:

okay....sniff* sniff*

Girly Girl says:

what no talking now?

Tea-tea Mong-Whore says:

Drinking.

Girly Girl says:

beeR?

Girly Girl says:

gofigure?

Tea-tea Mong-Whore says:

I tell ya, a lion's gotta drink what a lion can get.

Tea-tea Mong-Whore says:

No, I'm drinking soapy water? You happy now, kid? Hunh?

Girly Girl says:

Yes Only I am allowed to drink

Tea-tea Mong-Whore says:

Why I oughtta... Freaking kids. Don't respect their elders. I died and rose again! Seen Simba do that?

* * *

Yeah, I should really stop typing when I'm high on lack of sleep. Especially since this whole Aslan thing has bled into every other thing I'd done tonight...